porloscaminos: simple questions

domingo, 19 de julio de 2009

what do you do with your sadness?
where do you throw it?
where do you hide it?

Jessica P. dijo...: Sometimes I swallow it and it fights its way back up my throat, and I swallow again and again against the tightness.

I used to write it into a book, but I have become a more physical being of late.

Sometimes it mixes with rage and frustration. In those moments I wait until my baby is asleep and my man is at work and I hit my mattress with both arms as fast and hard as I can. I hide it in secret violence against soft, inanimate objects.

And it sneaks out in the dullness of my expressions, my face, my voice. That is when I am most sad, when I cannot sing. When I cannot be angry. When I cannot smile from my heart.

I guess I am not so good at hiding my sadness if someone is looking at me closely.

I am not sad right now, but it comes and goes.; 20 de julio de 2009, 9:19